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Mark Twain

Quotes: (ranking: 620th)
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Quote	Category	Rating
"There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it. How strange it is. It is like paying out your whole fortune for a cow that has gone dry."	Food
"There are laws to protect the freedom of the press's speech, but none that are worth anything to protect the people from the press."	Writing
"The reason why truth is so much stranger than fiction is that there is no requirement for it to be consistent."	Truth & Lies
"The reason we hold truth in such respect is because we have so little opportunity to get familiar with it."	Truth & Lies
"The problem is not that we have too many fools, it's that the lightning isn't distributed right."	Comedy
"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not."	Health
"The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them."	Reading
"The man who carries a cat by the tail learns something that can be learned in no other way."	Experience
"The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money."	Friendship
"The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year."	Holidays
"The conviction of the rich that the poor are happier is no more foolish than the conviction of the poor that the rich are."	Money
"The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up."	Happiness
"Suppose you were an idiot...and suppose you were a member of Congress...but I repeat myself."	Clever Jabs
"Sacred cows make the best hamburger."	Miscellaneous
"Providence protects children and idiots. I know because I have tested it."	Children, Intelligence
"Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside."	Food
"One of the striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives."	Truth & Lies
"Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven."	Religion
"Of all the animals, man is the only one that lies."	Truth & Lies
"Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it."	Truth & Lies

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