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"Nothing travels faster than the speed of light, with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own set of laws."
"I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by."
"I am so amazingly cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis."
"If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands."
"It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes."

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